The Emotional Addiction of the Self
I woke up the other morning and as I was lying there in bed, I leaned over and grabbed my phone from the nightstand and opened the home screen to all my Apps. What was I going to do? I was going to begin my morning ritual of checking my News and Facebook Apps. My self was itching to get its’ morning emotional fix of what’s happening in the world and in other people’s lives. For me, after overdosing on the emotional turmoil surrounding our latest election, I decided to turn the T.V. political shows I use to watch off. So, my emotional addiction surrounding my fix from my political shows is currently in cold turkey withdrawal. After 7 weeks of no shows, I was craving my emotional fix as I stared at my News Apps and then a scary thought popped into my head. Why not delete my News Apps and cut that emotional lifeline that is feeding my Self? I am not sure where the strength came from, but my shaky finger held down one of the App buttons so all the Apps are now vibrating on the home screen with little x’s beside each App, just waiting to be pushed to delete the selected App’s. I quickly clicked 4 of the x’s associated with my News App’s and with the touch of a finger I disconnected my Self from its’ direct source to the emotional turmoil in the world around me. I resisted the urge to go all the way off the emotional grid by deleting my Facebook App, but I have found myself just taking a cursory look through posts related to family and friends rather than perusing the content for that emotional post that my self desires to experience.
2017 from a numerology perspective is a 1, which represents new beginnings. For me, losing Margaret was something that never entered my thought process, but I do know there are no accidents, so, ironically 2017 will definitely be new beginnings for me. If I learned anything from Margaret and Maitreya, it was that emotions feed our Self and cloud our perspective. They keep us focused on the external happenings around us, rather than facing our own issues related to our own fears, doubts and insecurities; these are our true gateways to happiness and full awareness.
So, for me in 2017, I am unplugging from some of my external emotional stimuli that really only serves the Self and am going to try and face some of those fears, doubts and insecurities. For someone that has Saturn in the 1st house of self-worth, they won’t be hard to find. As a Libran, I can already feel the fear, as I contemplate upsetting someone as I speak my truth. LOL
Have a great New Year and look in the mirror, face some fears and nourish the Higher Self! Best of luck in 2017, it’s a new beginning. Trust me, the answers are not in the emotions, but the Self is and it’s addicted!